The pursuit of happiness

      I’m not sure who needs to hear this but pride and the pursuit of happiness are like oil and water. They absolutely DO NOT mix. Now that we got that out of the way, I hope everyone’s still maneuvering through this pandemic as best as possible. It is imperative to do periodic mental health check ins. This has been and will be a time of revelation for a lot of us. However, you have to still be mindful not to be the weapon formed against yourself that’s causing  you not to prosper. 

        I believe that it’s safe to say that the goal for most is to simply be happy. As outlined in my journal Love Language, that may not look the same to everyone. Different people equate different things with happiness. Instead of realizing it is merely an act of self, once you’ve made the decision to be just that. Happy. When your feet hit the floor in the morning, it should be you who decides what type of day you have. Of course there will be occasional unforeseen circumstances that come up. In those times it’s your attitude toward those things that dictates how you react in those situations. 

       When speaking in terms of a mate and happiness, it is unfair for them to be expected to bear the burden of your internal feelings. Happiness between two people should look like...You bring your happy to meet up with my happy, and let’s just be super happy together. And on the days in which they struggle to find their smile,THEN you remind them of all the reasons they have to do so. 

       When a person is struggling with emotions, it is easy for them to place blame with their significant other or someone who they may be dating when they feel unhappy. Doing what’s easy is not always what’s right. This pandemic has either given some a lot of alone time or a lot of time together. In either instance, being happy and whole all by yourself sets the precedence for how you make it through each day. With or apart from your person. It is also a direct reflection of how the interactions are with those people in your life. In a relationship of any sort, both people should be at the center, whereas one person is no more important than the other.  

        If the intentions are real and rooted in love, knowing that having self love or putting yourself first does not mean to do so at the expense of hurting someone else. And exaggeration of the importance of self or your feelings over another’s is prideful. Relationships require openness, honesty, and humility. When meeting each other in the middle with these attributes there is no room for any confusion to breed unhappiness as a unit.          

        Taking into account that we don’t live in a perfect world...sometimes, things just don’t work out for one reason or another. I now challenge you all to also take into account that none of us are perfect and that being accountable can mend many of broken fence. During these times more than ever, it is imperative to stay as positive as possible no matter what is going on in the world around us. That is the best way to keep our mental health in tact. Respecting and nurturing genuine relationships is a great way to maintain a healthy distraction. Never be so self absorbed or be so at war with your inner self that you allow you to be your own worst enemy. 

        Remember, when you wake up in the morning, seize the day and claim how it will go. Some days may be harder than others. On those hard days, speak affirmations to yourself. I am happy. I am healthy. I am whole. I am love, therefore I give and receive love abundantly. If you struggle with this mind set, leave yourself post it’s in places that you will see in the morning. Be fair to yourself. And be as fair to your relationships as you would like for them to be to you. Everyone has different struggles. No ones supersedes the others. And at the end of the day, we’re all in a daily pursuit of happiness. Don’t hurt yourself trying to hurt someone else while on that pursuit. Wishing you all love and light.~D.W. 


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